I Love You, Marion Cotillard

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/5a52180b80/forehead-tittaes-w-marion-cotillard

Conan Knows

Again, I Hate Cats

You Know It’s a Friday Before a Long Weekend…

… when somehow in a chain of emails with co-workers figuring out what to do for lunch, the topic veers towards lamb sharks.

The Soft Bigotry of Low Expectations

It’s no secret that I’ve railed against Americans’ petty foolishnesses of late.

I know that the real “real America” isn’t the one being portrayed in the media, with the misspelled banners and the weight problems and the blind allegiance to charismatic figures claiming a return to God via a wide array of merchandising.

I know that the real “real America”—the America I love—is a living, breathing amalgam of hardworking men and women, from all sides of the political aisle, who put in an honest day’s work every single day to keep this country functioning 24/7.

Admittedly, it’s easy to demonize a group that believes differently than we do.

Throughout America’s history, the “other” has always been painted derogatorily. When the Republicans are in power, the Democrats are bleeding heart hippie commies who want abortions. When the Democrats are in power, the Republicans are uneducated religious fanatics who are slaves to big business. Hell, even in our recent past as a nation, from McCarthyism to segregation, steps were taken to institutionalize our mistrust of the unfamiliar. We seem to be naturally built to think less of those whose perspectives, skin color, gender, sexual orientation, hair color, etc. are different from ours.

But alas, the ideals of democracy demand that all groups be included.

And the ideals of democracy endow us with rights and responsibilities.

And I think forgetting that or marginalizing what that really means is what frequently gets us in trouble in our public discourse.

Joe Klein has an interesting op-ed in Time magazine about how democracy can be operationalized. He talks about the concept of a kleroterion, an ancient process that basically puts the decision-making power for governmental processes in the hands of ordinary, randomly-selected citizens. It’s kind of like jury duty on steroids, only for deciding how to spend FY 2011 funds instead of whether a criminal should be executed.

He then conjectures, based on some modern-day iterations of the kleroterion, what it would be like if America were run more like a democracy.

What would that be like indeed?

I have to admit that I’ve often looked at the “other” with disdain and mistrust. I’ve perpetuated the soft (or not so soft, as the case may be) bigotry of low expectations.

If I were to truly embrace the ideals of democracy—and stood for everything that entails—it may mean that I let my blood simmer rather than boil every time I hear Beck or Palin share their views about how the country should be run.

It may also mean that I need to take responsibility for being the solution to the problem rather than supplying the fuel.

I understand that we can get caught up in the daily minutiae of putting food on our table. And I understand that it’ll take time and tremendous effort to cut through the weeds and bullcrap from all nooks and crannies of the political machine. But every once in a while (and perhaps close to mid-term elections), I think it would do us well as a country to stop and think about what being part of a democratic society—indeed, the world’s greatest democracy—really means.

A New Englander’s Endorsement

If you’re in DC and you’re not following @lobstertruckdc on Twitter, you’re stupid.

Emmy Roundup

As an avid TV watcher, the Emmys are like my crack.

A few random observations about last night’s awards:

1. I’ve been riding a wave of Glee decline after re-watching some old episodes and noting that some of them don’t really hold any narrative water on second viewing. The inconsistency in characters (quicker than, say, Edward Norton’s turnaround in American History X after an unfortunate prison shower, uh, gathering) is a real turn off, because you can’t really get emotionally invested in characters that you know will change their minds or have a complete about-face at the end of the hour.

2. That said: Bravo for an excellent Glee-themed opening. I’m not a fan of Jimmy Fallon’s, but Tina Fey and Jon Hamm stole that opening, from Fey receiving a slushie to the face/chest to Hamm shaking his booty under Betty White’s sordid direction. If anything, that opening captured what’s most engaging about Glee: the exhilaration of wanton abandon while running down a blue hallway or escalators in dance/song.

3. The Modern Family sketch with that guy from Family Guy who does all the serious voices. From Stewie’s cameo to Sofia Vergara’s 3D boobs to Cam, Mitch, and George sharing a bed: Brilliant!

4. Per usual, loved the intros to the nominees for best writing for a comedy program. My two faves: Colbert’s human centipede plan and Stewart’s Beck-ian rant.

5. Eric Stonestreet’s win for best supporting actor in a comedy for Modern Family, his gracious speech, and my knowledge that he was in an episode of SyFy’s Scare Tactics a few years ago.

6. For an Ivy League graduate, Claire Danes is surprisingly not very articulate.

7. I don’t watch anything on CBS. Jim Parson’s win for best lead actor in a comedy series for Big Bang Theory was a surprise. And also him looking like a really sick Skeletor was a surprise. (Maybe it was just the HD on my 52” flat screen TV?)

8. Top Chef finally broke the Amazing Race’s streak for best reality program. Finally. Again: I don’t watch anything on CBS.

9. Like their careers, Matthew Perry and Lauren Graham’s scripted banter seemed so late 90’s, early 00’s. That’s probably why it fell flat on its gay face.

10. I love Edie Falco. Let’s hope she doesn’t start starring in variety programs or movies/miniseries, or everyone else’ll be screwed.

BONUS: Ricky Gervais. Looking svelte. And handing out beer. ‘Nuff said.

Well, It’s a Race to *Something*

No words.

But What If They Did?

The Washington Post has an interesting article about New Yorkers’ views around the “Ground Zero Mosque” debacle. (It is, after all, their deal, and the… uh…“real Americans” have basically hijacked the issue.)

It’s interesting reading to say the least, but my favorite quote from the article comes courtesy of Damon Thomas, a doorman at a strip club across the street from the proposed mosque site: “Hey… strippers didn’t fly planes into the buildings.”

Indeed they didn’t.

But what if they did?

A Tale of Two Franklins

Spoiler Alert!

Last week, Franklin, the deliciously psycho vampire bent on terrorizing Tara on True Blood, met his demise.

He’s the second Franklin that’s made an indelible mark on my TV watching experience.

The first, of course, was much, much naughtier.